Why do we care so much about what others think about us? Shouldn’t it matter far more what we think of ourselves? Well of course it should matter more what we think of ourselves, but not caring what others think is not that simple. We care because if we go back to basics we are a pack animal, we know that we survive better when we are not alone, hence we crave to be part of a pack, or group of friends, and family. We want to feel accepted and there is nothing wrong with that.
We tend to find that problems arise when we try to fit into a group of people who we actually don’t really admire, or like based on our morals, values, or similarities. Instead at times we feel we need to be accepted by people whom we perceive as being ‘better’ than us, perhaps due to there social status, or materialistic items. It isn’t any wonder when we are fed adverts constantly throughout the day. Not just television commercials, or even via radio, but all the subtle messages we may not even notice. Adverts are everywhere, on public transport, highway billboards, magazines, newspapers, people’s blogs, in shop windows, on abandoned buildings, aeroplanes, coffee cups, we even find our letterbox full of advertisements. The doctors office has signs up, their pens bare pharmaceutical brands, that free bag, pen or magnet we got from that lovely business has a brand on it, our clothing bares a brand name, as do our handbags. We literally walk into a shop buy a T-shirt because it has the brand name on it, pay a fortune for it, and then walk around giving them free advertising.
Wanting to be part of a group is perfectly normal, wanting to feel loved, accepted and interesting is also natural, even though I crave alone time, I also crave affection and acceptance. At times sadly I admit I have made poor choices in friends, choices that compromised my values, but we live and learn from our mistakes. It is not even that some people are necessarily bad, or even that they are not nice people, they were just wrong for me, and if being part of a group means having to compromise myself, pretend I’m someone I’m not, or spend my time, or money on things that don’t make me feel good inside then quite frankly the acceptance of some people is not worth my personal sacrifice.
I think that is why finding self acceptance, and taking the time to get to know what matters to us is so crucial to our overall health and personal wellbeing. I think for some this personal wiseness comes early, for others it often occurs in their thirties when they begin to come into their own. I believe their is a reason we hear so many women in the forties, fifties, sixties say they are happier with themselves than they have ever been! There is no magic age, but I do believe the more we grow, the more we experience and sometimes the more mistakes we have made, we learn more about what truly matters to us. We have a better sense of what life we wish to lead, and we are more willing to listen to our gut, or inner voice than we are to other people’s opinions of ‘what we should be doing‘.
I certainly don’t have it all figured out, I am sure I will have more mistakes to make and learn from. I think though I am at a point where as much as I still hate making mistakes, (perfectionist still in me), I am aware that if I do make them the whole world won’t fall apart. I know that I spent too many years worrying about what people thought of me, worrying for example that if I started writing, that people would think me foolish, I was scared to unleash my creativity, or voice my opinion, I was sacred for way too long.
I realised, by a reminder I received the other day that I started my blog 4 years ago on November 5th. I knew nothing of blogging, I looked up how to start a blog and just did it on a whim. Thank you for those of you who follow me and have supported me along the way. The so called experts say that to have a successful blog you have to have a particular niche, I couldn’t conform to that, as my blog was titled reflections from me, that is simply what it has been. It has changed with me, as my thoughts or feelings changed, or a particular topic grabbed me I just wrote how I felt. I write what comes into my head, which is why sometimes I apologise that I ramble. I do not plan, or schedule posts, other than the link ups, or Instagram hashtag feature posts, I have no regular days, or times I publish. I realise this goes against what makes a good blogger, but one thing I have been consistent with is that I write from my heart. I write with authenticity, and although I am not in a niche, I do hope for one thing, and that is to hopefully help someone out there have a better day, or write a post that inspires someone to live more authentically, to help people know they are not alone in struggles, or insecurities, or in their battles with mental health. If I can make a difference to even one person, then the past four years has been worth it.
Below I have selected my recent favourites for the Instagram hashtag #LivingFearlesslyAuthentic, whatever living authentic means to you I hope you grab it! I hope you sing as loud as you want, that you dance like you just don’t care, that you never let anyone silence you, and that you find the things you love and even if they seem foolish or difficult you give them a go!
Please scroll below to see my featured photos and I will just add these two images shared on insta by @lisapomerantzster. That where captioned perfectly with;
NEVER TO OLD TO FLY, THANKFULLY
I am always grateful for all of you that share your authentic moments, both happy and hard with our Fearlessly Authentic Instagram Community. If you don’t know about this community it is a space where you can share any real life, authentic moments in your life on Instagram simply by tagging #livingfearlesslyauthentic on your pics. Each month I share my favourites here at Reflectionsfromme.com and will notify you on Instagram.
Here are my recent favourites!
These great images were shared by;
@rachh.liz. @the_treehouse_jibhi.
@serenity.now_. @cuddle.fairy.
If you don’t already follow these Instagramers please check out their feeds. Don’t forget to tag your images with #LivingFearlesslyAuthentic!
You can follow my feed @Macglanville.
Thank you for reading this today, Love Mac xx
10 comments
Wow blogging for four years. It’s goes so fast and I have to agree I have learned so much through blogging and have certainly grown. #BlogCrush
Happy blog-iversary! I was a teacher for over 30 years. I used to have a quote posted behind my desk about “being your own bada$$ self” that only I could see, just to remind myself to be authentic with my students. Whenever one of my students would walk around behind my desk, however, they could see the quote. I didn’t get fired, though! I guess that’s pretty mild to 17-year-olds! 🙂
I LOVE this post.
like you , my blog has no niche , I don’t post at set days or times . I actually follow none of the rules that would make me a ‘proper ‘ blogger but actually people seem to like that about my blog -as they do yours.
Authentic all the way!!!
#blogcrush
#Ablogginggoodtime
A lovely read. I also think that with age you become less botehred about fitting in with certain groups and tend to find the people you are most comfortable with.
Yours is the kind of blog I look out for … reflective, honest and engaging. Keep them coming!
Happy Blogiversary ! I love the fact that you don’t have a niche and just write about what you are feeling or being passionate about. It’s what makes your blog so brilliant! #A BloggingGoodTime
It’s important to a group of friends that works for you, and that you can feel relaxed enough in to be yourself #ablogginggoodtime
So very cool and happy for you. Keep on doing it. You learn a lot of new things by being yourself and remembering that the only person that you need to impress is the “Person looking back at you in the mirror”. #ablogginggoodtine
I love this post so much, Mac, and not because you have featured my kinder (which I am very grateful)! Self-acceptance is not taught to us, yet we all, or at least many of us, get in this rut of hating ourselves. Why? If only we could treat ourselves like we treat our friends. We all need to find the volume button on that dreaded inner voice and crush it! I love you Mac, and this post is so awesome. I blog just like you – write when I can, no planning, no thoughts ahead. May I be a successful as you one day! M’wah dear friend! xoxo #ablogginggoodtime xoxo
Happy Blogiversary Mac! It is very true that we (most of us) learn from our mistakes. That is how we grow and learn to become who we are meant to become. And who we truly are. I’ve made some poor choices in friends, relationships, even trusting family I shouldn’t have trusted but I learned from every one of those and I do love who I have become. #ABloggingGoodTime
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