There is a funny thing that happens when you have children, you may relate?
When you tidy up it only seems to last ten minutes. I am not quite sure how it happens? It doesn’t matter how long you spend cleaning, it really makes no difference. You can vacuum, dust, scrub the texta of their desks, polish their school shoes, but within minutes it is all undone, yes all that hard work undone!
OK so truth be told I know exactly how it happens, it is kids, they have an inbuilt system within their bodies and minds that forces them to be messy! Husbands can have this too I have discovered.
My hubby is amazing, truly he is, but when it comes to mess it is like he doesn’t see it. Does anyone know what I mean? He can literally step over something and yet not register it needs picking up.
But maybe mess isn’t the enemy, maybe we should surrender to the mess?
Mess is fun right? It means you are living!
To some extent I believe that, yes I do, I promise. I used to be an “over cleaner” and I found that people couldn’t relax in my home, it was like they were scared their kids would mess up something, or that they would! I found my kids were feeling bad about making mess! When Adam was born I felt overwhelmed with all my roles, I was mum, wife, cleaner, daughter, cook, bottom wiper, nappy changer, breast/bottle milk on demand feeder, story teller, nursery rhyme singer etc…….. I was exhausted with trying to be perfect mum and perfect tidy house lady!
Sometimes it is about priorities, and my priority was enjoying life. I didn’t enjoy having a perfect clean home, I enjoyed hugging my tiny munchkins and letting them be kids! So I surrendered to mess, yes mess beat me down, it won and you know what I was happier and my kids were happier. Yes I still cleaned and yes it took many years to really throw caution to the wind and not spend endless hours cleaning things that really didn’t need it. I still like being tidy and I am a bit funny when it comes to germs so I do love a clean kitchen and bathrooms, and I enjoy beautiful spaces, but more than that I like “lived in spaces”, because that is what I want to do, I want to live! I want to enjoy my home, my crazy kids and my hubby who see’s the house as clean no matter how much washing needs doing, or how many dishes are on the sink.
Somedays my home is picture perfect, other days I have washing hanging over my kitchen table and a pile of ironing I am ignoring, but that’s OK, that is life, this is my life and I want my kids to know that life can be messy and chaotic and that’s OK. If they need a chat or a hug then that pile of washing can wait!
What about you? Do you have a super tidy home? Does your hubby notice mess? Share your thoughts with me below.
Thanks for joining me, love Mackenzie xx
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22 comments
This is something I so struggle with. I stress myself out on the daily trying to keep the house looking like a page from my Pottery Barn Magazine. I really do love a tidy house…but with four small kids and a hairy dog having a clean house is much like shoveling in a snowstorm,
My house is only ever picture perfect when the kids arent home and that is hardly ever haha. at the moment the house is a tip! sorting it weekend 🙂
I hear you, Mac! I think of my life as Before becoming a Mom and After Becoming a Mom. In the before, i used to be particular about keeping house. After, as long as it was reasonably clean, I was okay. It was more important to enjoy cuddling, loving, being happy and creating memories. A few years ago,my friend sent me a cute poem titled Dust if you Must. Here it is: I thought it was worth following 🙂 Hugs! Love your post!
Dust If You Must
by Rose Milligan
Dust if you must, but wouldn’t it be better
To paint a picture, or write a letter,
Bake a cake, or plant a seed;
Ponder the difference between want and need?
Dust if you must, but there’s not much time,
With rivers to swim, and mountains to climb;
Music to hear, and books to read;
Friends to cherish, and life to lead.
Dust if you must, but the world’s out there
With the sun in your eyes, and the wind in your hair;
A flutter of snow, a shower of rain,
This day will not come around again.
Dust if you must, but bear in mind,
Old age will come and it’s not kind.
And when you go (and go you must)
You, yourself, will make more dust.
Loved the poem specially the last lines.
What a great post Mac. The Mrs., she makes fun of me. I have inherited the tidy gene from a militant OCD mom. Not good. She, not so much. Walking over those same messes you speak of with your hubby. I’ve learned it’s much better making memories than cleaning up after them. 😘✨ M’wah! Xo
Oh i live in a mess…with 2 kids and 3 cats, I’ve given up trying to clean every day, although I really do need to vacuum at least 2x a day because the kids are such messy eater. It drives me and my husband crazy seeing food all over the floor! #bestandworst
It’s the opposite in our house. My husband is the super clean one and I’m a mess! he works away for ten week at a time and the kids know the routine so well now that whenever I’m running around doing a really big clean they ask if Dad is coming home the next day!
#bestandworst
Our house was built in 1863… It never looks clean! Alway DIY to be done to tidy it up. Clutter everywhere because it’s a small house. It’s liveable in but it’ll never look clean so I’ve given up!! #bloggerclubuk
I describe myself as a tidy person in a messy person’s body! I really want to have a tidy house but I just never seem to achieve it. The mess really bothers me (unlike my husband who, like yours, is oblivious to anything that needs putting away!) but it just seems to be self-perpetuating. I reckon our house is as tidy as it can be, given that we have 2 little ones living here too. #SharingTheBlogLove
I wish I had a super tidy home, I always want to achieve that but it doesn’t really happen it’s an ongoing battle for sure! Thanks for linking up to the #bestandworst
We can’t be perfect…well, not all the time! Tidiness is not our priority, unless someone is coming over, we prefer to firefight and not tidy; just make sure it’s not too chaotic as it only gets messed up again instantly with two kids! #Sharingthebloglove
I have to confess, I’m not a tidy person! My husband is always nagging me to pick my clothes up off the floor of our bedroom! I am quite proud though, and will always present a tidy house if I know anyone is coming round. In fact, we said the other day when we were tidying before my parents visited that we should try to invite people round at least once a week to force us to tidy up! Thanks so much for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove
Hey, nice idea for forcing self to clean up.
My partner is super neat, and even prekids I’m super messy. I don’t tidy until about 10 mins before he turns up. When he goes away, I indulge in not tidying up until the night beforre his return. It feels naughty and decadent and like I’m having an affair…hehehe. Thought the last time, even the kids started asking me why the toys were all over the floor…(That all said, i have to do the kitchen stuff – I seem to be OCD on dishwasher/clothes washing) #Stayclassymama
I’m trying so hard to not be bothered by mess. I had no idea I was such a neat freak until now. I think my house is tidy but possibly not clean. It’s such hard work to keep up with it all though!! Kids don’t help at all!! #bloggerclubuk
I struggle to be tidy and in fact my husband is better than me! But I am house proud and I want it to be spotless when people come round and we run around doing it before people arrive. I always wish I could have the perfect house where it doesn’t matter if someone dropped by, but honestly that won’t happen and feels me with dread. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove Laura x
It took me long to let my Husband know that I do not like crushed bed sheet. Yes, mess is fun with Kids.
I’m sure there’s something Feng Shui about a tidy home, I really feel so much more together when everything is clear and organised. But about 20 seconds later, it’s trashed!!!!
#bloggerclubuk
Ah totally agree! Mess is fun! And I’ve just recently read an article in the Independent that people who have messy desks at work are I more intelligent because apparently they are spending more time thinking about something else rather than cleaning. That must mean that every single Mom out there is intelligent! Haha! This is a lovely message and a great reminder for us all to appreciate the moment and forget about the mess. Thanks for the advice and sharing with #StayClassyMama!
Oh I get this!! I’ve still not quite given up on it yet but I’m almost there as it really stresses me out when it doesn’t stay tidy!! So there seems little point! I think you’re completely right!! #sharingthebloglove xx
I always think that if things are clean enough to be hygienic then mess is nothing! The housework will still be there another day so I say enjoy the moment, play with the kids and let the mess reign!
Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes 🙂
Debbie
Yes, I lean towards over-cleaner currently & my house is pretty clean & tidy, especially for having two toddlers. I think you’re probably right though – probably better to relax a bit! & it is time consuming. I do also HAVE to have a clean kitchen & bathroom though. I don’t get people who can stand to leave those rooms dirty – what about hygiene?? #anythinggoes
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