Don’t we owe ourselves, as much as we believe we owe others? The obvious answer would be ‘yes’ wouldn’t it? Yet we are often left feeling guilty if we actually give ourselves as much, or more than we give to others. We fear people will judge us, or we will miss out on opportunities if we say no to people, or turn down invitations to social events, family get-togethers, or work events.
Sometimes saying no is actually saying yes to ourselves, it is allowing us to take a a night off from commitments and actually just allowing our minds, or bodies to rest.
We don’t want to be passed over at work, or miss out on that fun night, (that isn’t actually that fun, it is just how the selected photos on Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram make it look)! We don’t want to hear our mother, or which ever relative it may be, telling us for the next month how we let her down by missing the family event, or how we embarrassed her by not showing up. It is not about anyone else, it is about you! I mean have we actually forgotten that this is ‘our life to live’!
Everyone has an opinion on what we “should” be doing, or what we “should not” be doing! It is our choice how to live our own lives, we know in our gut what feels right for us, yet we ignore it time after time just to please others.
There are times where we really need advice, support and help from loved ones, where we ask them what we should do because we feel lost, and there is nothing wrong with that as long as we know that they truly have our best interest in their heart. Even then, we need to keep in mind that the end decision is ours to make! We need to feel we are making a choice that fits our morals and our passions, and also that we are making a choice based on our own self-care and wellbeing.
Ask yourself!
How would it feel to trust that you know what is right for you?
How would it feel to say how you really feel and what you mean?
We are the ones that live with our choices. We need to decide what is the right fit for where we are right now, and for the future we want to have, but we also need to consider our mental and physical health along the way. We need to ensure we are going forth healthy, informed and with our eyes wide open. Trust yourself, trust how you feel, trust that you know you better than anyone else. Now go and live a fearlessly authentic life!
I am always grateful for all of you that share your authentic moments, both happy and hard with our Fearlessly Authentic Instagram Community. If you don’t know about this community it is a space where you can share any real life, authentic moments in your life on Instagram simply by tagging #livingfearlesslyauthentic on your pics. Each month I share my favourites here at Reflectionsfromme.com and will notify you on Instagram.
Here are my recent favourites!
These great images were shared by;
@everyday_gyaan. @helloarchie.co.
@_oceanair_saltyhair_. @hayley_and_rory.
I think the @everyday_gyaan picture really sums up what I am talking about in this post, don’t you?
If you don’t already follow these Instagramer’s please check out their feeds. Don’t forget to tag your images with #LivingFearlesslyAuthentic!
You can follow my feed @Macglanville.
Thanks for joining me today, love Mac
13 comments
It’s taken me years to realise that being me is OK and I don’t have to try and please everyone. Great post.
I’ve always found it really difficult to say no to people and put my needs first. I think this comes from being a child in care, a time when you learn to keep your head down, go with the flow and dont create problems.
#abloginggoodtime
I’ve made a couple of very big decisions around my career in the last month, so this really resonates! I need to trust I did the right thing. #blogginggoodtime
“Sometimes saying no is actually saying yes to ourselves”, I like that! Not easy though! #ABloggingGoodTime
I agree. You have to say no to a lot of things to say yes to the things that really deeply matter to you! It can be hard at first, but it does get easier with time.
I always say that best word you can ever use is the word NO because you can turn a No into a Yes when it is good for you but you can’t turn a Yes into a No when you are in trouble. #Ablogginggoodtime
I have learned to say no as my chronic illness has gotten worse. I have limited energy and I am very picky about how I spend that energy.
Thank you for sharing
#ablogginggoodtime
Fearlessly authentic is a wonderful goal!
Well said you are important and it is ok to say no X #ablogginggoodtime
Hello Mackenzie,
“It is our choice how to live our own lives,” truly got me. Sometimes it can feel like we’re living someone else’s life. But life is too short to give it away to someone else.
Best,
Sigrid
Mac I think I actually have a qualification in saying no and putting myself first. This has been more true over the last yea. As I recuperated I found myself questioning not only various people in my life but events too and thereby really reprioritising everything in my life. As you say it is important for us to be selfish sometimes and really choose how we want to live for us. #ablogginggoodtime
There are times when I say yes to people when I really want to say no but for the most part, probably because of the work I’ve done on myself, I know how to set boundaries with myself and with others and that is helpful. It helps me to say no when I really need to in order to relax and unwind, which is something I need to do on a daily basis. #ABloggingGoodTime
Hear, hear you go woman #ablogginggoodtime
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