I just did the unthinkable . . . the most forbidden couples sin known to man (or woman)! I have betrayed my husband’s trust in me, do I tell him? How do I tell him? It disgusting! Do I tell you? I am so embarrassed, it is gross, and something I swore I would never do, a line no one should cross! OK, here goes, honesty at any cost right? Don’t judge me! I accidentally, yes accidentally used my husbands toothbrush!!!!!! I know gross right, horrible, sickening betrayal!
Oh the shame! There I was, clearly in my own world, which if you are a writer you will totally understand, and if you are a multitasking woman you will understand too, please understand!!!! Anyway Mac get back on track! So there I was in all my absent-minded-glory stuffing around in the bathroom as us glorious beautiful creatures do, and I thought I better brush my teeth, I reached for the toothbrush (clearly not using my eyesight), and squeezed on the minty fresh toothpaste (at least I was thinking about my hubby getting to kiss me all minty fresh, see good wife points, right?) I ran some water on and . . . . . . . . . well I started doing the unthinkable, I started brushing my teeth with the wrong toothbrush! I am sure Mr toothbrush was screaming out to me
“HEY YOU crazy lady! I don’t belong to you! Put me down, put me DOWN!”
I must have somehow heard his desperate cries because I suddenly looked at the toothbrush and it hit me OMG what have I done! I mean his toothbrush is Red and Silver, my toothbrush is a perfect Pink! There she lay, lonely, abandoned, my pretty PINK toothbrush, I am sure if toothbrushes had feelings she would be shedding a lone tear, feeling so jilted and discarded, feeling like a castaway on a lonely island wishing Wilson would come back to her! OK Mac, isn’t it more embarrassing pretending toothbrushes can talk, or possibly possess actual feelings? And now I am talking to myself! Yep crazy lady alert.
It was one of those horrifying moments where you realise you have done something so unthinkable. You may be thinking so what!? I mean obviously I kiss my husband, obviously we made 3 babies, (sorry Dad), but it is different isn’t it. This isn’t kissing, this is a cleaning instrument! Gotta love the internet, what a handy tool TO FREAK A PERSON OUT! (Also love it because clearly my blog wouldn’t arrive to your email address, or Facebook without it). But, the internet is a bad, bad thing when you want to diagnose yourself or look up germs on toothbrushes!!!!
WARNING, look away now if you don’t want to know what internet says about germs on toothbrushes, you may be traumatised, seriously damaged! You can not unsee what you have seen, you can not unread what you have read!
www.besthealthmag.ca says
“A plethora of bacteria, germs, fungi and viruses can live quite happily in your toothbrush for months. In fact, scientists have found more than 10 million bacteria living in a single toothbrush.”
It also mentions vulgar words like Streptococcus, Herpes Simplex Virus, Toilet Bacteria (yes I know nauseating, horrific even), and Influenza Virus! Bad right, really, really bad, gruesome!
Do you know they actually suggest we use a different toothbrush in the morning and evening, so they have more time to air out, dry and de-germ (I made up the last word hehe).
OK, I was convinced, I reached into the cupboard and pulled out some new toothbrushes, luckily we keep spares on hand, phew! Now it was time to fess up, to tell hubby the truth, the scandalous, loathsome, despicable, vile, detestable truth!!!!! I wasn’t sure if his love was strong enough to stand the betrayal, he had only just bought this shiny silver/red toothbrush, and I had killed him, I had used him and then tossed him away like he meant nothing!
It has been a few days now, since the unmentionable betrayal, and I must say my husband has not quite recovered from the shock, nor have I, I still can not explain my slip up, how that toothbrush got into my mouth, and scrubbed my teeth, but I am happy to report my husband and I are still very much in love, and yes he is still kissing me despite the fact that according to Wiki, our mouths have 500 to 1,000 types of bacteria, happily though much of that bacteria helps prevent disease! I am also happy to report I have not come down with Influenza or anything else! I have now learnt my lesson, and I keep my toothbrush on the opposite side of the bathroom!
Thanks for joining me, love Mackenzie xx
“laughter is an essential part of my daily food intake, because without laughter my mind would starve”
Mackenzie Glanville
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5 comments
Haha I must admit I have done this once and I was soon grossed out! But I think it was one of the kids toothbrushes which to me was so much worse. We all know kids carry super germs and all!
Mac, Mac, Mac, that is really bad for you, I’m sure Mr Mac couldn’t care less.
It’s not like he had to use it again.
Look on the bright side, it could have been Hollys tooth brush.
so true, I would prefer to share a toothbrush with my hubby more than my puppy, even though she’s more adorable than Mr Mac!
Funny! And if it was a stranger’s brush I’d be grossed out, but my husbands? We do far grosser things together as husband and wife….
True, but it still grossed me out lol. Thanks for the comment!
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